Mr.B is in Kijev….I am in Vienna feeling kind of stiff and clumsy…trying to brainstorm for two graphic classes “homeworks” … but everything I do looks terribly bad…with drawing it is so strange….u can do anything, which means absolutely anything and even more than that….its like an unlimited space…you sit down take a pen and you wanna start draw…and than it comes, the shock…Its like felix Baumgartner siting on the edge of his capsula looking down to little something to the small point where he wants to get, but first he has to jump into the open space…that is how I felt today when I wanted to make a drawing for another silk screen print…like a tiny something sitting on the edge of unlimited possibilities and my head started to spin around and my breath became irregular and my hands were shaky…millions of possible ways and you don’t know which one to take…even Agatha Christie did not help…Murder of Roger Ackroyd always gets me to the mood….I guess I’m gonna take Mr.T for a walk and treat myself with some hot chocolate….
Did not get me a hot chocolate because the only place around that offers it for takeaway is Starbucks….sorry that does not sound good….I decided to do small shopping…and again the same situation…I hate doing shopping for anything and everything besides books and pencils…I thought I have it all set in mind…I was sure I know what I go for…its always the same…I enter the shop and in 10 seconds don’t know what exactly I wanted..maybe this, maybe that…and I end up getting bunch of things that I did not actually want and need but I take them anyway because its better than nothing…its ok to shop online…you have time to think it through…if u r not sure u bookmark it in the long wish list…than u forget about it and you save money …but shopping in the shops is disaster…to many things that stare at me and look like I might wanna eat them…or to many toothpastes that scream they’r the best for every problem…even those problems that I don’t know I have…So I came to cashier after 5 minutes of chaotic running around ( I always get stressed when Mr.T is waiting for me outside )…I stand in the line ….one men before me..one behind me…take the things out of the basket and than it hits me….I feel like I m watching myself in the american comedy movie…I see this stereotyped role of menstruating ( even I’m not at this blessed period of month right now )unhappy woman getting ready for pyjama party…the guy before me buys 6 beers, 2 bottles of milk and duplo…and than there is me with 3 bottles of lemon flavoured mineral water, snacks for Mr.T (to make it perfect I should be getting cat food ), 2 packs of scented tea lights and 5 different sorts of chocolate….Thank god he had that duplo